Oh The Places I've Pumped (or Nursed)

All the juicy, interesting, places I've pumped or nursed a baby in the wild. Can't wait to hear yours.

Formal gown at a black-tie gala. Photo credit: me.

Congratulations, you’re off on your way, the adventure is here!

I hope you have your breast pump, your flanges, tubes, and nipple shields near! 

When you set off on the journey of becoming a mom, the whole breastfeeding thing - 

you weren’t fully aware of just what you signed on. 

All the stress that it caused and bottles and parts to wash, 

Was it worth it you wonder? Sometimes you think not. 

I’m going to tell you about the places I’ve pumped, 

like in the car with my pump in the trunk…

Alright, enough with the Seuss. This piece is in part a nod to the popular and ubiquitous graduation gift Oh the Places You’ll Go!, but I haven’t had my second cup of coffee and trying to keep up with the rhyme makes me tired. 

I am going to tell you about all the interesting places I pumped or nursed, to the best of my recollection. It’s been an adventure that has spanned three kids in eight years. 

These are not the typical places like the baby’s room, my bed, at the dinner table, the office, but the wild and interesting places. 

Here we go: 

University of Cincinnati Medical Center NICU.

Cincinnati Children’s Medical Center NICU.

A room in Cincinnati Children’s Medical Center PICU. 

Various hospital rooms on Cincinnati Children’s Medical Center A4 South Wing. 

Various therapy and treatment rooms at Cincinnati Children’s Medical Center Department of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics.

The green room of a music venue in Nashville, Tennessee, where the company I worked for hosted a conference. It was a large, comfy space with exposed brick and actual green walls! It had a cushy leather couch and a fridge. There were pics of famous people who performed there which I forget because I was too focused on getting in and out without feeling judged by co-workers. 

A cinder block meeting room space at the Renaissance Nashville with no internet. 

Traveling back and forth to said company event on I-65 and I-71. On the return trip home I kept the pump hooked up and did “power pump” sessions for the entire four hour drive. 

Kids First Sports Center. 

Cincinnati Northern Kentucky International Airport.

The guest bedroom at my cousin’s house during my baby shower because my first born arrived 11 weeks early on May 18 and my shower was held on June 11. 

Rozzi’s Famous Fireworks parking lot. We’d been caught in terrible traffic and my son was not having it. I got off the highway, pulled into this parking lot, and climbed in the back of my mini-van (her name is Elsa, guess who named it?) to nurse. Little did I know at the time, I’d be back to the same parking lot to buy Fourth of July fireworks during the height of COVID. Real fireworks are only legal in Ohio during the Fourth. It was the most diverse group of people united in a shared desire I’d ever seen. Granted that desire was to blow up pyrotechnics, but ‘Merica! I think we all needed to let off some literal steam that summer.

Nursing Nest at the Cincinnati Zoo. 

The guest bedroom at my cousin’s house during Christmas Eve dinner. 

Tampa International Airport. 

Delta Flight 2765 CVG to TPA and Delta Flight 2287 TPA to CVG. I upgraded to first class to have the extra space, and being able to breastfeed a baby on a flight is a dream. Fussy baby? Whip out a nip. 

Daiquiri Deck. 

Siesta Key Beach. 

Spearfish Grille.

Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport.

Delta Flight 4803 CVG to MSP and Delta Flight 5233 MSP to CVG.

Screened-in porch overlooking Spirit Lake in Spirit Lake, Iowa. 

My mother-in-law’s property on Pearl Lake, Minnesota. 

Jackson County, Minnesota, County Fair. There was a big sign warning infants and toddlers to stay away from the farm animals due to disease. Super reassuring. 

Back room of event space at Cincinnati Music Hall while attending a black-tie event for the Dragonfly Foundation.

Looking back at this list, how do you feel? 

Like an exhausted mother wondering how this was real…

The journey was high, the journey was low, 

But look at all the lengths you would go…

The days were long and the nights were tough, 

but the lesson you learned is that you were enough. 

What’s the wildest place you pumped or nursed? 

Dr. Seuss book you read most to your kids? (Cat in the Hat and I would try and do it like swimming laps by taking as few breaths as possible)

What do you want for Mother’s Day? (new running socks, that Jones Road balm the internet suckered me in to but has been vouched by my already beautiful and talented friend

Melissa Cullens

, time and space to focus on a project. Shameless plug, Let it Flow would make a great gift!)